Choosing Light in Darkness: D’s End of Year Reflection

Choosing Light in Darkness: D’s End of Year Reflection

It’s hard for me to feel positive these days.

Every time I open the news, it feels like everything is going wrong. We keep hitting records ecologically. On a planet that’s rapidly warming without any signs of slowing down. Through news of wars and suffering, to propagandas and political interests. 

Hope felt like a candle that’s being blown by wind from multiple directions. It’s hard to keep it alive.

This hasn’t been an easy year for most of us. And I wish I could say the thought of quitting never entered my mind. That I remained strong through things going wrong. But the truth is, sometimes in my weakest moments I longed not to be responsible for so many lives.

When the weight of the world feels too heavy, I wonder why I should care. Does what I do make any difference?

If you have been feeling like this too, I just want you to know that you’re not alone. And it’s okay.


It was my recent fieldtrip that changed my perspective. I was sitting next to Ibu Srikanthi, one of our very first Ibus who now became an instructor in Rumah SukkhaCitta. She barely looked up, deep in concentration as hot wax flowed from her tjanting when she told me the one thing that she has held on through the ups and downs of her life.

Urip iku Urup. We live to bring light.

Each of us carries a bit of inner brightness. Something entirely unique and individual. A light that is always there, even when we don’t feel it. Even when darkness seems to take over.

We may not be in control of what happens in the world. But we’re in control with how we choose to show up today. We can choose to bring a little light to others. How you treat others, how you show up in the world, how you respond when things don’t go your way.

We always have that choice. And no one can take it away from you.

When we take up the courage to shine, no matter what, we light a flame that together becomes bolder in brightness. Shining the path forward, for a future we believe in.

So as we close yet another cycle around the sun, I hope these simple words will give you a space to reflect. Perspective, as it did me.

May you never forget what matters.


Your forever nerd,
Denica

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